It’s been months since I last wrote a blog. After my rant on the music industry and the artist’s responsibility to their audience (see here), the superficial happenings in my life seemed trivial. Having been so candid about the unglamorous side of the rising artist’s life, it was hard to go back to updates on concerts, or reviews etc.
So I decided to wait until I was actually inspired.
The New Year is always an impetus for reflecting on the last year.
Boy oh boy, has it ever been a full one, sooooo insanely full that it burst.!
Yes I am a 10 year old doing grade 5 science experiments in the Arctic Vortex.
Now, I do hope that those flying little pieces were shot with enough force that they will find their destination and land one day, wherever on earth that may be.
Momentum is my friend…I am waiting…
I was thrown up against the ceiling and down against the floor, both times splatting emotions “negative” or “positive”.
But living like that is E X H A U S T I N G so I started speaking to my self more often.
(No I am not crazy, I just get that from my Mom who ~ as much as she speaks to herself or her dog ~ is definitely quite wise. And, remember I am an only child. I know how to NOT get lonely. As in, “Hello, Chloe, you’re a good girl,” … Or … “Hey, Chloe, what do you want to do today?| … and so on …
But, really, to get back to those negative-positive shenanigans:
Who am I to say what is up and what is down? It’s all one big squiggly wavelength. Up and down and wiggle waggle. It’s all just sounds … la la la … and in some way, they are all beautiful.
I guess I could say…
(Yes, I’m about to get cheesy here. Here I go:)
I am living in the key of ……..CHLOE!!!
Ba da doom ching!!!! (Get it? I’m a musician? Bahaha. Yeah… I’m not that good with jokes but I guess you caught that.)
Anyway, I took this perspective and instead of judging events as good or bad I attempted to live by:
There is Chloe, the experiencer ~ and Chloe, the observer. Perhaps being a Gemini I can split myself into two but still, the Chloe you know is the one full of emotion: dramatic, elated, and bursting with feeling. But there is also the Chloe you don’t really get to know. She is the “Me” who watches from a distance like an owl perched on a branch gathering it all in as the novel unfolds.
Whenever life falls too far to one extreme, grave or euphoric, Chloe Number 2 is actually excited and entertained by the twists and turns of the plot.
Life is quite the storyteller and it’s incredible to simultaneously be cast as the protagonist and sit back with your book and read along.
… in the midst of this roller coaster, this stance allows me to ride along as it plummets or skyrockets and still maintain some measure of peace (and keep my lunch down).
Sometimes as we watch our lives unfold, we take a step back and realize that it is also possible to co-author our own lives if we know what we want and what is important to us.
Occasionally I know what I want. I always know what is important to me:
Relationships, creation, challenge and passion.
And while last year sure was filled with the people I love, tons of new creations, bundles of new challenges, and even more passion for music than ever before, this year I plan on increasing that exponentially ! Hehe!
So, Happy New Year to everyone!
Here is my story in one big breath:
Last year I…
… went tribal on your ass, grew some kick ass eyelashes, shared stages with Maceo Parker & Boy, played some festivals in Holland where I got to check out Gregory Porter and Ghostpoet, hung out in the trees of Kentucky with Neil and Mack, travelled 48 hours by bus with Neil from Shangri-la studio in Kentucky to Number 9 studio in Toronto, rocked it at the Mod Club with Dr. Draw and Cai.ro, learned how to skateboard, played the London Jazz Festival, was an extra on the latest David Cronenberg film, worried about money, spent a lot of money, had some crazy allergic reaction, got some love from Billboard Magazine, got some love from Rolling Stone, braved a blizzard to chat with Jian Gomeshi on The Q, played dress up, played dress up again, and again, had a few breakdowns, considered quitting this music thing and then played Jazzahead (Bremen, German) which gave me hope…
…lost my grandfather, took up painting again, moved twice, made friends with a family of Nutria (giant swimming rodent that is not nutritious), had my portrait painted, signed the same guest book as Katy Perry (my hero! Bahaha), fell in love with Toronto in the summer, spent tons of time with my friends, hung out on rooftops with cocktails in the Toronto sun, went swimming in Lake Zurich, played under a magical tree on the river of Solothurn, lost my phone, had it returned, lost my phone again, had it returned, lost 2 phones, had them returned, lost my wallet, had it returned, lost my wallet again and had it returned and finally lost my phone, did not have it returned…
I slept in cars, went hiking in the rivers of Algonquin Park, talked to wild turkeys, tried to look more like my Mom and went blond for a day, got some snuggles from my Mom, made friends with a caterpillar and a snail, read a lot of dumb German books to improve my German, wrote a bunch of songs, sang a bunch of songs, did a ton of co-writes, played a ton of shows, flew way too much, drove way too many kilometers, learned to appreciate my alone time, cried from exhaustion, danced till 6 am in condos atop Toronto’s sparkling streets, made some baby fans, let out my really girly side and took advantage of the samples and nail polish booths at Sephora, made colourful explosions in Sunnybrook Park and luckily avoided the attention of the police, lost my father, got eaten to death by mosquitos trapped under my skirt, shot my favourite music video (Refrain from Fire), missed my kitties, Rufus and Tuula, played dress-up again (this time with my Nana), hung out with my “best” friend Rob Ford in his diaper at Newstalk 1010, saw my first shaved cat, got to see my album in the stacks at HMV in Toronto and at Dussmann in Berlin, hung out at Toronto’s nudey beach…
…made a delicious lemon tart (twice), rocked a fanny pack, got to blab on about how useless the idea of perfection is for a TedX Talk, had my album reach number 9 on the iTunes Rock chart in France, heard way too much about this paleo diet, enjoyed a delicious paleo meal that made me consider converting, wrote a blog that spread like wildfire (see here), ate a ton of Muesli, lived off of frozen fruit smoothies all summer, blew bubbles that turned into ice, turned boiling water into snow, fell in love with the magic bullet (its blending powers are dreamy), had stretching yoga parties with my roommates, went tobogganing on pure ice at Trinity Bellwoods doggy park, celebrated the best and coldest Christmas ever, made a lot of new friends in a lot of new places …
…and made new memories with old friends and family.…
Here’s to new challenges, love, creation and passion in 2014!
Love you all,